Mawwiage
by technotreegrass
Summary: "Mawwiage. Mawwiage is wat bwings us togeder today. Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam wifin a dream… " (The Princess Bride) What should be the happiest day of Jack's life turns out to be trial by fire as he deals with his in-laws.


_Author's Notes: This is probably late (again) but here's a little something to celebrate the one year anniversary of Jack and Ashi's marriage. Canon be damned, I say she lives! I swear by_ _whoohoo dot co dot uk / main dot asp anytime I feature the Scotsman and his family._

* * *

The wedding day. Often said to be the best day of one's life. For Jack and Ashi, it was proving to be just that.

Unfortunately, it is customary to share such a joyous celebration with friends and family.

"If anyone objects to these two being bonded in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace," the justice of the peace instructed.

Jack and Ashi just continued to beam at each other, thrilled that this day was finally here. Surely no one would be stupid enough to say anything.

"I don't like him," came a rough voice from the bride's side.

"Noted, Dad," Ashi acknowledged with vexation, refusing to look away from her husband-to-be.

"You can do better than him," added another.

"You're not stopping me from marrying Jack, Mother," she hastily argued, trying to remain calm, seeking refuge in the groom's eyes.

The justice of the peace blinked twice. In his decades of performing marriage ceremonies, no one had ever spoke up. "Anyone else?"

The groom's side bristled with indignation at the outburst of the bride's parents, especially the best man. "How dare ye, ya blasted—"

"Scotsman!" Jack snapped, also not looking away from his beautiful bride.

"Cannae take him anywhere," Flora shook her head.

The justice of the peace cleared his throat and continued on, and once again Jack and Ashi were lost in their own world as they proudly affirmed their love for each other and were formally declared husband and wife. To celebrate the occasion, and agitate her parents even further, Ashi turned a demure kiss into a passionate one, jumping into his arms. The crowd inside the pavilion roared with approval, except for the scowling parents of the bride, glaring at their other daughters for sharing in the celebration.

By some miracle, they were on their best behavior for the photographer, giving them jovial smiles that Ashi knew to be a complete lie. Jack hid his confusion, preferring to think that just for a moment, everyone approved of his marriage and shared in their jubilation. But curiosity got the better of him and he asked Ashi to shatter the illusion and tell him the truth when they rode in their private limo to the reception.

"Simple, I told them they'd get the bill for the photos if I wasn't happy with how they came out," she explained with a devilish grin, "and she doesn't come cheap."

"Such a clever wife I have," Jack smiled proudly, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"One who is proud to call you her husband," she smirked, curling up next to him and laying her head on his shoulder.

Jack kissed her forehead. "So, your parents have expressed their views of our marriage, for the millionth time. Do you believe they will stop now that the ceremony is complete?"

"They had better if they want to be involved with their grandchildren," Ashi laughed.

* * *

Perhaps having seven daughters cancelled any desire to spend time with young children ever again, because neither Aku nor Azula relented with their opinions. Everyone stood and cheered when the newlyweds entered the reception hall, except for Ashi's parents. They grumbled their disapproval at the marriage, at the venue, at _everything._

"I told you I wanted Skybator to be the deejay. What is _she_ doing here?" Aku demanded, pointing at the young woman behind the deck, giving shout outs to many of the guests over the music.

"Skybator's in jail, _remember?"_ Ashi reminded him, struggling to keep her cool. "He was arrested for being a fence and having teenagers steal items for him. Jack knows Olivia and she was thrilled to take over at the last minute."

"He's such a social butterfly," her father sneered. "Mark my words, when you come crying to me that Jack's been sleeping around, you'll get no sympathy from me."

Ashi clenched her jaw, holding back a desire to snarl at her idiot father. "He would never."

"I disagree."

Jack swooped in and stole her away before things got hostile, "Ashi, someone wishes to speak with us." He gently but firmly grabbed her arm and pulled her away. "He's not worth it," he whispered in her ear.

"I'm trying," she growled back, "But the things he's saying."

"Lies and conjecture, nothing more."

But the two were relentless as the night continued.

"Selfish woman! How dare you show up your elder sisters by marrying first! You should have waited for Aki and Ami to be married."

"Leave her alone, Mom," Aki defended, rolling her eyes. "I'm not going to hold my sisters back. I don't have a bae of my own yet and that shouldn't stop Ashi from enjoying hers."

"What is this language you speak? Talk sense!"

"A special someone, Mom. God, get with the times already!"

"Aki deserves an especially large thank you gift for deflecting some of their negative attention onto her for a while," Jack said, watching his sister-in-law with some pity. "We never should have assigned your family to one table."

"It wouldn't exactly look right to have my parents sit alone at an 8-person table, especially with such a large guest list that can easily fill tables," Ashi argued, and then gave him a playful smile. "It's your fault for being such a social butterfly you know."

"I suppose it is," he smiled back, briefly kissing her.

Just when the couple assumed they could handle the problems that was the bitter parents of the bride, the problems of having an open bar revealed itself.

"A toest tae th' canty coople," a drunken Scotsman called out, and many raised their glasses high and cheered.

"Enough of this foolishness!" Aku slammed his fists onto the table and stood up, attracting the attention of everyone in the room. "Step away from my daughter. I won't stand here and watch her ruin herself by associating with a fool. It's not too late to annul this mistake."

 _"Never,"_ Jack growled, standing protectively in front of his wife. "I _love_ her, why can you not see that?"

"That's it! I've hud it wi' ye ruinin' everythin' aw nicht wi' yer moanin'! Tak' thes, ye spindly nae guid divit!" Scotsman ran across the room, quite nimble for a large man with a fake leg, and punched Aku square in the jaw. Before he could react, Scotsman grabbed his opponent by the beard and tugged it harshly. "Ye caa thes a beard? Whit ur ye, a goat?"

"Barbarian!" Azula shouted, but Bonnie gave her a shoulder tackle, knocking her to the floor.

"Dornt ye daur tooch heem!" She shouted.

The whole room exploded in chaos as many tried, and failed, to separate the combatants, with Jack firmly holding back his infuriated wife. He spared no expense on the dress; the last thing he wanted was for it to be torn in a fight. She had no such qualms, pulling on the sleeve of his jacket until he let go, fearing that she was ripping the seams, and stormed out of the room.

"Ashi, wait!" Jack cried, running after her, finally catching up with her in the bathroom, his heart breaking as she clutched the sink, makeup smearing from her tears. "Ashi," he reached out to grab her shoulder, but she smacked his hand away.

 _"Your_ friend is such a beast!" She snapped, poking him in the chest with an index finger.

 _"Your_ parents are atrocious and ill mannered," he snapped back, repeating her same action. "But it will be worth it to endure their idiocies if I get to spend the rest of my life with you."

She sniffled and blushed, hating herself for always getting choked up when Jack talked like that. How could she stay angry with him if he always knew how to talk his way out?

"I knew what I was getting into," he continued, easing his way closer, his hands resting at her waist as he locked eyes with her. "Remember when I came over to meet your parents for the first time?"

"Mother screamed, 'Call the police, there's a hooligan in my driveway,' because you rode your motorcycle over," she laughed at the memory. "Avi wanted to steal you for herself, she was so impressed."

"But I only had eyes for you, just as I always have, just as I always will. So long as we're together, we will survive whatever life throws at us, including your parents, and my best friends' drunken loyalty."

"Just a few more hours of this, and then we'll be away on our honeymoon," Ashi smiled at the thought.

"No contact with _anyone,_ just me and you," he confirmed, sealing the promise with a passionate kiss.


End file.
